hi gepisar,I would try and say spirituality is the place where you exist in, when a thing of such a nature makes you question your Self being. It is in the pain of feeling that you know that you exist. Or the smile of a beloved, that is so intense on your heart, and the thought that if someone felt like that, about yourself, it would be unimaginable. Spirituality is to feel that even the worst of life is bearable if it is around someone you love. For me it was to meet the strange power of god. To get that kind of thing, I would imagine, would be hard without inspiration or an epiphany, of some sort, I suppose I was lucky in the fact I had an epiphany a few years ago, I believed in god firstly with my logical head, I once thought when I was very young that I was part of a universe, and, I think so therefore, I AM, but I could never understand why, if, I was, did I create a world of war and disaster, I could never find myself to agree with the known doctrine of Christianity, as even being under ten, I actually believed we all had our own universe and the collective conscious was to bizarre a thing for me, as it meant if I had been experiencing myself for eternity, I was doing a pretty lousy job of it because I was stuck in some kinda time continuum, I knew that Jesus was not god, it seemed just to obvious? Kinda. Anyway, one of the catholic teachers, an older guy (about 50) pulled me in front of the class and openly declared me a pagan, I wasn’t shocked, as at the time it didn’t matter much to me, but it mattered to him, as a time later, he took me to one side and apologized, and I could see he meant it, later in life on reflection of things, the memory remained and I couldn’t understand why. As I rolled through life, I went on to do lots of extraordinary things, which most people would never do back in the 60s and 70s,and onwards, like you, I looked for the enjoyment in life, and experienced many sides of life, never to bad but never to good, stuck in the dunya (world) and enjoying the moment of life as it happened, I always thought there must be a driving force other than myself, kicking this universe into gear. So after many years of it (spirituality) not really being a thought in my head, I came into a really trippy time of life, at about forty two, I met a girl half my age who seemed to be attached to me in a loving way. She was and still is, very beautiful to look at, like Cleopatra, very aqualine features, and a strong character with a touch of wild madness, I suppose it was paradise on earth for me, anyway, after almost six years and one child (aged 5) things went very badly wrong, in my naivity of women, I actually thought I knew her, uh! Uh! Not even close, I was shocked to say the least, we lived quite high of the hog for those six years and I suppose I was blind to life, as I was very wrapped up in the work I did for a living, I adored my little girl and felt so terrible that her life had gone to shit with her mum becoming the way she was, mum got off and me and my little girl got on with our lives, this was the period when I became aware of Gods presence in my head as a logical reasoned thought, as I had gone into myself on a quest for understanding of life. After a long time of listening to my jewish friends and muslim friends to get an answer, It one day absolutely just dawned on me as a fundamental truth, and I fully accepted that God was truly the master, about a week later someone handed me a piece of paper and what was wrote on the paper was the complete sentence, La-illah-a il-la-llah, which means, There is no god but god, and that’s when the epiphany happened to me, and it was very very intense, it made my body go into a kind of shock, and the weight of worry was lifted from me, strange as it may seem, from that moment it changed my phsyche into a more balanced being, all the anger of life went from me and I became a grateful believer, and now my spirituality allows me to look at life in an almost observer way, and it helps me in every way I can think of, even when things look bad it is still a blessing because the bad always brings with it a clearness of thought and a way to explain or behave, that for me was my introduction to belief in god and a full sense of my spirituality, I wish I could pass it on, but it appears as an enemy of these times, to feel this way, and sometimes it can be a strain on people near me as it threatens them in a way I cannot understand, after this epiphany I started to read the philosophers in a fragmented way, to see what others thought, and islams philosophy is ideal for me, unfortunately, it is not everyones cup of tea, certainly after the dissapointment of christianity, but one thing I always felt was true, was the message that Jesus was telling people. (just read the sermon on the mount, it is truly very deep and meaningful) as I didn’t really know the ways of prophet mohammed pbuh, I decided to follow what I know as the teachings of the messiah, which is very spiritual and not the way of the new testament at all, gepisar, if that gave you any insight at all, then it is down to you gaining spirituality, if it comes across as just some ramblings of a nutjob, then I don’t know what else to say

, I think you get it or you don’t in this life, but in the next episode we will know for sure. Peace to you and yours, and everyone enjoy the christ mass holy day, not that I believe for one moment it is his birthday, but the sentiment that is expressed within the nonsense is a blessing to one and all peace
if you wish to create a favourable History, then you have to start now.