Questionnaire For Irritating Doorstep Callers

[Veronica]

Of course, the other point is that - on the basis that a Summons is the same thing as an Invitation - one could word it as "Summons" at the top.

[no_ta]

As we get a lot of obscure tree shakers ringing at our place of toil, asking for the honourable MD, we could use this to bugger em off. I don't mind a business call which is straight to the point, but I really hate those who lie to try and speak to me.

[IamallthatIam]

most excellent idea !! Love the CRB check - me having 4 kids at home, i would have to make that compulsory lol, and just to piss them off, along with " have you ever been included in a register for sex offenders. i would want to know everything, blood group, shoe size, what they want for christmas, time they last changed their underpants ,everything - well they do it to us !!!!

[Veronica]

me having 4 kids at home, ...

Five.

(Sorry Si ... couldn't resist)

[Veronica]

(Slightly off Topic ... but what the hell)

Asking personal questions reminds me of a US Radio Quiz Show involving couples. Where one of the couple has to answer 3 personal questions about their relationship … and then the other is rung up, and asked the same 3 questions. If all questions are answered the same, then the couple wins a holiday.

Husband (on the show) is asked “When did you last make love to your wife?”. He says “This morning”. Then asked “Where did you do it?”. He says “Well, my parents are staying with us, so we did it downstairs, in the kitchen”.

The wife is then called and asked the same questions over the phone. She answers “This morning” to the first question.

To the question “Where did you do it?” she answers “Up the ass”.

North America went quiet for about 20 minutes.

[IamallthatIam]

me having 4 kids at home, ...

Five.

(Sorry Si ... couldn't resist)

Well...yeah....fair point!

The wife is then called and asked the same questions over the phone. She answers .......

LMFAO....... i was waiting for something along the lines of ... "20 minutes ago with the farm hand in the cowshed" or something similar....

[Prajna]

Classic

[emerald city]

To: all

A N D .............. what about adding this :

"if your questions are relating to information that could benefit your business profits, customer surveys etc. Please NOTE that for this research information to be given to your company to enhance it's profits and data bank, I charge £50 per query answered. If this is acceptable, please tick below " .....................

[Phil: C]

If your aim is just to see them off as quickly as possible I really don't see the need to waste time with a written questionnaire - just ask some of the questions verbally, or simply politely decline. If your objective is to cause mischief and have some fun however ...
But they are human beings, so I personally wouldn't take it too far.